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INSTALLING A HUSBAND
>>
>>
>> Dear Tech Support,
>>
>> Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed a
>> distinct slow down in overall system performance, particularly in the
>> flower and jewelry applications, which operated flawlessly under
>> Boyfriend 5.0.
>>
>> In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable programs,
>> such as Romance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5, and then installed
>> undesirable programs such as:
>> NBA 5.0,
>> NFL 3.0 and
>> Golf Clubs 4.1
>>
>> Conversation 8.0 no longer runs, and Housecleaning 2.6 simply crashes
>> the system.
>>
>> Please note that I have tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these
>> problems, but to no avail.
>>
>> What can I do?
>>
>> Signed,
>> Desperate.
>>
>>
>>
>> DEAR DESPERATE,
>>
>> First, keep in mind, Boyfriend 5.0 is an Entertainment Package, while
>> Husband 1.0 is an operating system.
>>
>> Please enter command: ithoughtyoulovedme.html and try to download
>> Tears 6.2 and do not forget to install the Guilt 3.0 update.
>> If that application works as designed, Husband 1.0 should then
>> automatically run the applications Jewelry 2.0 and Flowers 3.5.
>>
>> However, remember that overuse of the above application can cause
>> Husband 1.0 to default to Grumpy Silence 2.5, Happy Hour 7.0 or Beer
>> 6.1 Please note that Beer 6.1 is a very bad program that will
>> download the Farting and Snoring Loudly Beta.
>>
>> Whatever you do, DO NOT under any circumstances install Mother-In-
>> Law 1.0 (it runs a virus in the background that will eventually seize
>> control of all your system resources.)
>>
>> In addition, please do not attempt to reinstall the Boyfriend 5.0
>> program. These are unsupported applications and will crash Husband
>> 1.0.
>>
>> In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have limited
>> memory and cannot learn new applications quickly. You might consider
>> buying additional software to improve memory and performance. We
>> recommend:
>> Cooking 3.0 and
>> Hot Lingerie 7.7
>>
>> Good Luck Babe!
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